The Smartest Person in the Room

I’ve long believed that the smartest person in the room is the room—that is, the collective wisdom, curiosity, and experience of the people gathered together. As educators and leaders, we know this intuitively. We’ve seen the magic of collaboration when ideas spark across difference, when someone says “me too,” or when a question shifts the entire energy of a conversation. But if we believe this, how often do we design for it?

Enter Priya Parker’s The Art of Gathering, a book that’s been sitting in my to-read pile for a while but finally leapt to the top. And I’m so glad it did.

Parker’s work is deceptively simple and profoundly radical: she argues that gatherings—any gathering, from a team meeting to a parent night to a conference keynote—should be designed with purpose, clarity, and a spirit of intentional hospitality. The result? A room where people are more present, more generous, and more open to change.

Hosting with Purpose

One idea that particularly stood out to me is the concept of the host—not just as someone who kicks off the meeting or offers coffee and muffins—but as a leader with intention. Parker writes, “A social contract for a gathering answers this question: What am I willing to give—physically, psychologically, financially, emotionally and otherwise—in return for what I expect to receive?” (p. 156).

It’s a powerful reframe: What if every faculty meeting had a clear social contract? What if we articulated the why of our gatherings, made space for vulnerability, and created just enough structure to let people show up fully?

Parker also reminds us that rules—when they come from a place of clarity and care—can liberate. A good host sets the tone, protects the purpose, and creates boundaries that help everyone thrive. In education, we sometimes bristle at the idea of formality or structure in our gatherings, wanting instead to be “chill” or “open.” But Parker argues, and I agree, that thoughtful structure can create deeper freedom. It’s a paradox worth leaning into.

Gathering as a Leadership Act

This has me thinking about the many “small” moments of gathering we encounter in schools: staff meetings, department check-ins, new parent events, student assemblies. These are often treated as routine or logistical. But what if we saw each one as a chance to build culture?

What would it look like to approach these moments with a designer’s mindset?

What would shift if we asked ourselves: Who is this for? What do we want them to feel? How do we want them to show up?

A Real-World Model: Cohort 21

I’m lucky to have a front-row seat to this kind of intentional gathering through my work with Cohort 21, co-led with Justin Medved and an incredible team of facilitators and coaches. Each of our four face-to-face (F2F) sessions is designed with care—space matters, time matters, food matters, and so does how we arrive.

One of my favourite moments is our second F2F. There’s something about the energy in that room: people arrive and greet each other like old friends, even if they’ve only met once. The connection is real because the gathering has been designed to foster it. That sense of community doesn’t just happen—it’s built, invited, and sustained through countless small choices.

So What?

Educational leaders: this is your invitation. Think about the next moment you bring people together. It doesn’t have to be big. But what might shift if you brought just a little more intention to it?

Could you open with a question that matters? Close with gratitude? Name a clear purpose? Set a norm that liberates?

After all, the smartest person in the room is the room—but only if we create the conditions for it to shine.

Here is her conversation with Brene Brown on “Unlocking Us”

https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-priya-parker-on-the-art-of-gathering/